When You're Done Having Babies

Would you believe that I get asked almost daily if we are done having babies?

Yes, daily.

No, I'm not kidding.

While I think this is an incredibly personal decision and people can and should have as few or as many babies as they darn well please, I've reached a different point in my life when I've had to really sit down and think, are we done?

We have always talked numbers of kids or when we reached our end, and while I'm not quite ready to say we are done having kids, I am pretty confident saying that Eloise will be the last baby to grow in my belly. Take that for what you want, things could change, but for now, that's where we are at.

For the past 5 years I have been pregnant, breastfeeding a new baby, chasing around toddlers and never seen or thought of an end to diapers, night time wake up calls and baby cuddles. But I see that end now, I've become pretty comfortable seeing the end, but I have had to ask myself, what now?

I haven't worked in order to take care of the kids and keep them home with me and I have absolutely loved that. I am very lucky that we had that option. I have done a few small projects, volunteer work, but everything has always revolved around my kids. With the twins off at full time school and seeing what that is like, and what my future will be like when all 4 are at school, I've had to really sit back and think about, not my kids, but myself. Gasp!

What do I want to do with my days? What do I want our family to be like when we have school aged kids? Do I want to work? Go back to school? Take a long vacation on a beach when I'm finally done breastfeeding? Ok, that's a given. But what about ME? What do you do when you're done having babies?

It's a different chapter in life and one I knew would come eventually but haven't given it much thought. I'm happy and excited to see how these 4 little miracles turn out but I'm also excited to have more time for myself and what I want to do and figure out what I want to be for this next chapter. I still don't think I know what I want to be when I grow up. At 30. Ya know.

So my question for all of you lovely readers, how did you know you were done? What changed when you were done having babies? What should I expect for life without a baby in the house? Besides taking all the baby gates down. Can I get a hallelujah for that one? :)

Bend It Like Beckham

Can we discuss the cuteness of 3 year olds with shinguards?

and they didn't even need the smallest size shinguards. Yes, they apparently make shinguards for kids under 3. They also make different size soccer balls, their coach had to tell me what size was good for 3 year olds. Clearly, I have a lot to learn before I will be a good soccer mom.

They started soccer last week and they like it but are a little intimidated.

Probably because most of the kids are actually bigger than them.

and a lot of cleats and legit soccer gear.

I have a LONG way to go, I'm telling you. I am a failure of a soccer mom.

I think it will be a really fun winter soccer season though! I'm excited to see them learn soccer! Jack just runs laps, Amelia gently kicks the ball around. We might not be raising any soccer stars, but it will still be fun ;)

The twins turn 3!

I posted that the twins had turned 3 last month, but I never got to share what we did for their birthday!

 Since it was in the middle of our move, we couldn't throw a big birthday party, like we've done in the past. It was at the end of our road trip though so we were lucky to be able to celebrate their birthday and my mom's birthday with all of our family at my parent's house.

Amelia has been telling me for MONTHS that for her birthday, her cake will be a Cinderella cake. I asked her if Jackson would have a Cinderella cake too and she told me that they couldn't have the same cake. Jack would have a Lightening McQueen cake. Isn't someone opinionated for a 2 year old? A few days before her birthday, after much pinterest searching and deliberating, we started the great scheme of their cakes.

Oh, another fun detail, Amelia's cake had to be chocolate.

Ready to see a pinterest fail? Yea, I don't see the picture making it into the pinterest world ever.

Don't judge me. It took me 2 days to make this masterpiece!

Jack's train worked out a bit better with the help of a train cake pan. I know it's not Lightening McQueen, but I thought Jack would like this one better and Amelia can't always have everything she thinks everyone else wants ;)

That's a lot of cake!

And to make things even cakier(?), my mom also wanted her own cake so we had 3 birthday cakes for 1 party.

I was a little nervous she wouldn't be so impressed with my sagging castle cake, but luckily, she loved it. The expression tells it all!

 All the birthday kids and their cakes!

 We had a great celebration with the entire family.

Someone else was super excited about all the cake. This boy never misses a chance to eat ;)

It was a nice quiet birthday but it was nice that this was their first birthday they could celebrate surrounded by lots of family. I think we'll like this living closer to family business ;)

And how are the twins doing for their 3rd birthdays?

Amelia weighs 27lbs and is 38" tall. Jackson is 31lbs and almost 40" tall. Jackson is going to have a 2nd opinion from a neurologist and an ENT to figure out what to do about his developmental delays and hearing. I'm hoping we'll be able to get some clear answers and be able to get him on the right path to "catching up" soon. Amelia had a follow-up with a cardiologist who says her heart murmur is very innocent and she's cleared to do all activity. We will start therapies and things soon and we'll get back in our normal routine. They're overall healthy and you'd have no idea what a crazy birth they had.

Amelia's favorites: All princesses, playing dress up and tea parties, doing things "I do myself". She likes to fill her own water bottles, make her own food, and go to the bathroom by herself now. Luckily, she still asks for help if she really needs it, but we've had a lot of messes to deal with from her next step of independence. She can dress herself and put on her shoes and socks so that's been really helpful in getting the gang ready for the day! She loves to help me change Ben's diaper and "feed the baby", even though he doesn't really need help being fed. She controls who eats and when and will distribute the gold fish to make sure everyone gets a fair amount. As long as she's in charge, she's happy. Luckily, the boys are happy to fall in line.

Jackson's favorites: Robots, legos, and trains. He has really gotten into legos and robots lately. He loves to watch them on netflix (usually old school transformers, I blame Tom) and play with the different lego things him and Tom have built. He is definitely a little engineer. He loves to play in water and has really enjoyed all the splash pads around Ohio. He still has some fine motor issues and obviously is much stronger on his right side than his left. Being left handed, he struggles to hold things and write/color. He is still very active and always into exploring things. He won't sit still if he can help it. He's just a busy busy kid who needs to keep his little mind busy 24/7. He's also my sweet boy though, and loves to cuddle and tell his mommy how much he loves her.

Happy happy birthday to my darling little twins! We love you and all of your crazy antics!

Potty Training Twins: In the trenches

Let's get one thing straight. I'm sorry to say, I have nothing positive to say on this matter. If you're reading this looking for words of hopeful encouragement and optimism, you should probably go find another blog post about potty training twins. If you want someone to throw a potty pity party with, then I'm your gal.

And one more thing, these past few months have been AWFUL. I have never been so frustrated, mad, stressed, annoyed, and straight up angry in all of my parenting days...which I'm aware, aren't very many yet, but I'm just saying. Goodness gracious.

SO now that we've got that straight, let me tell you what the last few months have been like for me.

Around the time when the twins turned 18 months, I had a distant thought about potty training. At about 22 months, I bought a potty and Elmo potty time DVD, sat my twins in front of Elmo on their little potties and stated to the world I was brave enough to potty train twins.

I don't think I could have been more wrong. Potty time turned into play time. I had 2 kids swimming in the potty more often than I'd care to discuss. Poop was flying left and right and so I threw up the white flag and said I was done. We'll try again....later.

Soon after they turned 2, that day came. I decided I'd try one at a time. Again, potty time turned into a fight for mommy's attention, screams of terror as I threatened to make them sit on the potty, and my carpets had never been more filthy, then clean, then filthy again, then clean again. That steam cleaner was a GREAT investment, FYI. There was a day I literally threw the boys at my neighbors, threw Amelia in the tub, and just wanted to sit on the floor crying instead of cleaning up AGAIN. Soon after that terrible day I quit with the potty training. AGAIN.

So here I am, with almost 32 month old twins (that's almost 3 for you mathematicians out there) and I am daring to put out in the world that I have a potty trained daughter and a son, who, bless his heart, is trying. So how in the world did all of that mess and despair get to a potty trained kid?

Honestly, beats the crap out of me. No, not the crap I cleaned off of the carpet a million times for days and days and days.

What did I do different? After we came home from our holiday travels, I decided, once again, I would try to potty train. I took the "I don't care, you're wearing underwear, you can sit on the potty if you want or not, and cry and poop and pee and do whatever you want but you're not wearing a diaper again" approach. Yes, that's the technical term. I stopped forcing. I kept asking. I stopped caring (sort of). And magically, Amelia will now ask to go potty, doesn't have accidents, and seems quite content to wear her princess underwear.

I feel like I've put in my time in the potty world that I deserved this happy ending, but I wish I knew how we got here so I could repeat it with #2 and #3.  You know all those people who say it just clicks? Well, apparently, it does just click. And then you're done. And you might forget your months and months (or in our case, almost a year) of torture and messes. Almost forget it, but not quite. I'm a little sad that jut because 1 got it, I'm still in the thick of potty training, but having 1 done does give me the hope that someday I will be done changing diapers. It certainly won't be tomorrow, but someday. Sigh.

I'll report back with updates on my next potty training attempts. #2 is going to be a lot more of a challenge I'm afraid. I'm still deciding if I want to push on and just get the messes done with or take a break from cleaning my floors for a few weeks...or months. I'll keep you posted.

For now, can we just all give me a virtual high 5 for being 1 down...2 (and maybe more down the road...no I'm not pregnant, I'm just saying) to go!

Ho Ho Holidays

We're not in sunny SoCal anymore Toto ;)

We've had  busy few days! Lots of fun getting ready for the holidays and traveling.

What do you get when you have a mother who hoards all of your childhood clothes and toys? Dress up your kids in ridiculous Christmas outfits? Yes, please.

Embarassing kids pictures. Now THIS is what the holidays are all about ;) Reindeer sweatshirts circa 1988 that belonged to me and my younger brother. Can we do a virtual ugly Christmas sweater party?  Because I think my kids would be top contenders ;) Have any embarrassing/funny holiday pics you'd love to share? Tweet them my way @emilytara #uglychristmassweater. I'd love to know I'm not the only one who does this to their children.

On another note, let's take guesses on how many times Jack would have ridden that tray around at the mall?

If you guessed infinity, you win. Number of times we let him ride it: Twice. He was very upset at the end of both rides. The boy certainly loves trains.

Two Point Five

Dear Jack and Mia,

2 1/2 years. I can't believe it's been 2 1/2 years since your exciting? stressful birth.

You came into this world in a crazy way and you have continued to keep the crazy going for 2 1/2 years now.

Jackson, you take train loving to a whole new level. Therapists, friends, family and everyone you meet knows you love trains. Your favorite book is Freight Train. Shocker. Mommy's least favorite book is Frieght Train. I find myself constantly tripping over, stepping on, kicking trains out of my way, but with every step, I get a little reminder of what a fun loving, playful boy you are and how sad and trainless my life would be without you here.  Although everyone would love to hear you says words other than "train", "chugga", and "choo choo", we'll get there someday and for now, I am just going to play trains and enjoy every second.

You've been pretty stressful these past 2 1/2 years with your climbing, unbabyproofing everything i just babyproofed, and love of living on the edge (quite literally sometimes), but your adventurous spirit is why you are so special and wonderful. I can't wait to see where that takes you, but will you just listen to me sometimes when it comes to making sure you don't fall off of something too high?

You always share with your sister and brother, give hugs the second anyone suggests it, and help mommy clean up every day. You are the most loving and generous 2 1/2 year old around and I hope you don't grow out of that.

Amelia, oh my sweet little girl. You are a spunky one. Your vocabulary these past 6 months has just blossomed to new levels. You are always reading, asking questions and learning. You say things that I didn't even know you knew. You are a bit obsessive like Jackson, just with princesses instead of trains, but your love of dreaming and all things pretty makes me smile.  I love having tea parties with you, reading new books, and exploring the world with your constant "What's that?"'s. You love your baby dolls, dressing up like a princess, wearing mommy's jewelry and shoes, and being an all around little girl.

You're not quite as adventurous as Jackson, but I'm glad he has you to remind him that he probably shouldn't be jumping off of the slide. You compliment each other so well. You certainly love your brothers. You are always asking where they are, making sure you have 3 of everything so your brothers get something too, and making sure they're taken care of. You help me give Ben a bath and wash Jackson's hands. You are mommy's little helper to a T.

But you don't always like to help. You're stubborn as can be and when things don't go your way you are so upset. Your strong will makes you a force to be reckoned with and I know you'll accomplish big things with that will power. I can't wait to see what the future has in store for you, but I know it will always include your brothers that you love oh so much.

I can't believe how much you've both grown and how much fun it's been to be your mom for the past 2 1/2 years. I'm excited to see what the future has in store for the 2 of you, because you sure are some great little kids!

Some growth stats on the twins since I haven't done this in awhile:

Amelia: 36 inches tall and 25 1/2lbs
Jackson: 37 inches tall and 28lbs

Both are tall and skinny! Some day they'll put some meat on them bones ;)



all pictures are from Jolens Photography

Fall Photo Shoots

Pumpkin Patches through the years...

2011

 

 

 

2012

(probably the easiest year to capture their cuteness since they weren't too wild yet ;) hehe)

2013

with an extra little face in our pictures! :)

A Seussical Celebration

To celebrate Dr. Seuss' birthday yesterday I decided the twins should dress their parts.

Since they're both sitting up now, I thought it'd be a cute picture!

Mia sits better than Jack. And has a mean left hook.

After trying to push Jack close to his sister and multiple jabs to his arm, chest, leg and head, they ended up like this...

That's what you get for punching your brother.

So after many attempts and many minutes of screaming, I settled for this.

Amelia can't give up the fight though. Stop going Mike Tyson on your brother. Leave his ear alone.

A person's a person, no matter how small. -Dr. Seuss

The fundraiser for the March of Dimes ends Monday!! Check it out and pretty please donate :)